Olivia Newtown-John choked back tears Monday morning, as she went on the record for the first time since her longtime boyfriend, Patrick McDermott, vanished more than three months ago.

"It's very hard for me to talk about," Newton-John said on "Good Morning America." "I love him very much, and as you can imagine, it's an incredibly hard thing to get through."

Newton-John's emotional interview also proved that the actress still holds out hope that McDermott, who never returned from an overnight fishing trip on June 30th, will be found alive.

"Patrick has a young son," Newton-John said. "And so we're still, we still hold out hope that he'll come back. It's a very painful topic, and it's still under investigation."

The Coast Guard and other authorities continue to investigate the mysterious circumstances surrounding McDermott's disappearance, and Newton-John has hired a top-security expert to search for clues.

But Newton-John says she's ignoring rumors that McDermott may have faked his own death to avoid ongoing legal battles with his ex-wife over child support payments. "It's very much a mystery," Newton-John admitted. "And speculation has been rife, and I've chosen not to buy into the speculation. This is such a personal thing for me and his family, and we've chosen not to talk about it."

Despite her heartbreak, Newton-John, a breast cancer survivor, is releasing a new CD, called "Stronger than Before," in time for Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Newton-John admitted that she didn't think she would sing again after McDermott went missing, but she said she's hoping the CD will inspire other women who are going through tough times. "I listen to it now," she said. "It's good for me also."